I Need a Dream Location to Write My Next Novel

I just finished watching an episode of “House Hunters International” (HGTV) where a lady sold her home in the U.S. and bought a dream house in Costa Rica, overlooking the beach, so that she could have the perfect place to write her first novel. Well, I admit it. I’m jealous. I’d love the perfect place to write my novels, too. Trouble is, I’d need to sell a lot of them in order to afford the house! None the less, it got me thinking….Here’s what I need:

A charming cottage in a small village outside of London, complete with a housekeeper who makes splendid breakfasts and provides tea and scones for me in the late afternoon. It would have to be walking distance to a lovely little town with a bakery shop, candy store and small produce market. I’d write lovely Romance novels while enjoying the view of my impeccable garden.

OOPS – I don’t write Romance. I’ll try again. Here goes:

A fabulously re-modeled condo overlooking the main plaza in Salamanca, Spain, where I could slip downstairs to enjoy early evening tapas and drinks with the locals. I’d dine in a different restaurant each night and eat churros every morning for breakfast before rushing back to my computer as I write my complex crime novels.

WAIT - I don’t write crime novels. Better try again:

A lovely Victorian house situated across from a quiet bay in Cape Cod.  I could walk barefoot on the beach and open my windows at night to let in all the soft ocean breezes. A local cook would arrive early in the morning to prepare my meals and clean the house, leaving me all the free time in the world to write my children’s’ books.

OH NO! I don’t write children’s books. This is NOT going to work! I’m faced with the following reality:

My computer/office/pile of books is located in a corner of the spare bedroom in our Arizona home. The window overlooks my neighbor Ed’s cactus garden and our AC unit. I’ve got to keep the door shut while I’m working or the cats will walk across the keyboard and pull the cords out of the computer. Once, one of them threw up a hairball on the keyboard. Try cleaning that!  With the door shut, the dog scratches and cries. If I let him in, he just scratches and cries to be let out. There is no housekeeper and no local cook. Still, I manage to produce YA mystery-suspense novels where time folds, ripples and bends.  It has to, I  wouldn’t be able to get the work done otherwise!